Q: How many sessions of Counselling or Psychotherapy will I need? A: This may not be apparent at first. It depends upon the issues involved, and each client will progress at a different pace. Some of the work will be long term and will need courage and commitment to see the process through, but in the long term your life can improve dramatically.
Q: How will I know if the therapy is working? A: The contract that is formed in the beginning will be re-visited regularly so that you can check on your progress. I am there for you at our set times and you can talk to me if you have any doubts.
Q: What do you mean by "the unconscious mind"? A: Imagine the mind floating like an iceberg in the north sea. The conscious mind is part of that iceberg that we can see above the water. About 10% of the whole, 90% of it is hidden beneath the waves.This 90% is our unconscious mind. In our day to day lives, We do not need to have permanent access to everything in the unconscious. There is so much stored in it that it would just confuse us. Every now and again though, we delve into it to remember a face or a name from the past. Have you smelled a fragrance or heard a piece of music that tugs at your memory and transports you back to the past? That is your unconscious mind.
Q: What is Transactional Analysis? A: Transactional Analysis is a theory of personality developed by Eric Berne and is one of the most easily understood methods of modern psychology. Berne believed that communication between two people is the pivotal force behind all actions and feelings. He called each encounter in communication the "transaction" and this method analyses these transactions.
Berne believed that each person is made up of three ego states - Parent, Adult and Child. When we are in our Parent state, we contain all the learning and conditioning that we received from our parental figures. It could almost be our parent speaking. The Parent can be a Critical Parent - "don't lie; don't talk back; don't talk with your mouth full etc', or a Nurturing Parent - "go to bed now; eat up and you will grow big and strong; I'll do that for you dear" etc. In our Child state we see, hear, feel and experience events as a child. We are dependant upon adults. We can feel deep anger, fear and despair. The Child can be an Adapted Child - the good girl or boy - or a Free Child - the naughty and rebellious one.
Both of these ego states are easy to recognise once we are made aware of them, but can take a long time to change as we have had years of conditioning. The Adult state is where we ideally would like to be most of the time. As an adult we are autonomous and can get things done by eliciting the reaction we want in our transactions with other people. Berne identified "drivers" - the ideas that drive us forward in life. Ask yourself:
Do you try hard but never quite get there? Does everything in your life have to be perfect? Do you constantly want to please the other people in your life? Are you too strong to show your feelings? Are you always in a hurry? What are your hopes and aspirations? Are they really yours or have you been conditioned to feel and think a particular way? Would you like to find out why you act and feel this way?
Transactional Analysis can help you to see life experiences from a different angle, to move away from unwelcome feelings and behaviour, to grow and lead a more fulfilled life. If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to contact me: josephine@towards-change.co.uk or 0771 7756034